If you love your corny Johnny’s clap your hands *clap clap clap*
If you love your corny Johnny’s clap your hands *clap clap clap*
If u love their pitchy singing and their cheesy dance routine,
If you love your corny Johnny’s clap your hands *clap clap clap*
Hah! How’s my song that I just wrote in a spur of a moment? Teeheehee… Well, my nuggets, as we all know there are a lot of Johnny’s fans, scattered around the world, but only those who are chosen, are becoming the fans of KAT-TUN, cos they can manage to tolerate all over the top swag acts and embarrassing sexy moves that these bunch of amigos have done. And for that, they got an appreciational nick-name, Hyphen. Talk about hyphen, I’m not considering myself as one though, cos I’m just an average Johnny’s watcher that currently find Kame as an actor with likeable screen presence in dorama world. But If I had to put myself as a hyphen, then well, you can call me hyphen; a cheap hyphen to be more precise, since I never buy any of their CDs or their other released thingies. All I have is the power of internet, and all I can give as the contribution to boost their career and popularity is my pray… and this mock-tastic post. Hahaha… *cynical laugh* oh, geez…my fangirl love towards these boys is clearly dysfunctional, just like Helga to Arnold. Gotta mock to feel the love!! Lol. Okay, enough with the jibby-jabber. Now I’m gonna talk about their concert that I recently watched out of my spare time boredom, KAT-TUN Live Tour 2012 Chain at Tokyo Dome, which I believe some of you probably already seen before I did. So, that’s why I won’t go play by play to talk about it, but instead, Imma go with division by perception concept. Okay then, what are we waiting for, let’s roooolliinn”!!!
So, in the opening, we get to watch a short clip of KAT-TUN boys acting cool with their dapper black suits. And then, all of a sudden they grow fricken angel’s wings and get to stand on a high ledge, on a bridge, and every other high place that will make acrophobias pass out in fear. And each of them holding a black ball (gee golly, KAT-TUN clearly have something for balls, either in Kusabi PV, and before that, in here) and it’s not just a plain black ball, for it’s a Ball! Of! Positivity! OoooohhHHH…!!! And each of them sharing it to the world and creating a CHAIN of optimism in the life of every human being. Wow, what a deep message for a ninny boyband. Lol.
KAT-TUN: The Upbeat Edition
So after the opening clip, KAT-TUN tachi show up in real time with the same exact black wardrobe and real black balls, and they start the non-stop upbeat session starting with the song BIRTH, and so on until WHITE with all the sparkly suits and moving stage. I seriously didn’t put much expectation when it comes to their dancing, cos KAT-TUN and dance are two colliding things, just like oil and water. Hah! And they somehow able to make optical illusion with their stage presence combine with the lighting technique, which make each song comes with much ‘fuller’ performance, and I must say that their messy (as usual) and lacking choreography are successfully covered by those. But in the third song, CHANGE UR WORLD, they sing it live, which turns out really good and effort-full. And it makes the performance becomes meatier, despite the lack of choreography. I think they should sing live more, cos they’re good at it. And then there’s a filler session for the wardrobe changing and then they’re back with futuristic style-clothing to sing LOCK ON and BAM! Kazuya Stevie Wondernashi is back! Booyaaah!!!Geez…why oh why do you think you look haaawt in that fricken shades, Kame-boy? Whyyyyyy??!! *face-palming* And then they continue the upbeat-fest with COSMIC CHILD; ooooohhhhh… I bet this is old man Johnny’s favorite tune. Y’know, all the sci-fi thingy, and lyrics with intergalactic words like “vortex”, “loop”, ”parallel”, “spiral”, “cosmic”, “nova”, “planet”, blahblahblah are always Johnny’s ichiban. Don’t trust me? Just listens to this (Cosmic Child) song, Fumetsu no Scrum, Kusabi, Fantastic Planet; you’ll find all these magic words. Hahaha…
After the first leg of the solo session (Taguchi and Nakamaru) KAT-TUN boys continue with their good ol song ノーマター・マター (No Matter・Matter) while parading in the colorful
circus ride and wardrobe. And they sing a couple more songs, with a lengthy MC talking session after that. Continue with SMILE FOR YOU; which I really like the wardrobe, bcos the fabrics are customized with the group and tour names. And then they sing and do the catchy dance along with the Johnny’s Jrs. And the moment Kame giving his mic to one of the kiddos is very cute.
On the third round, there’s an interlude segment that I call ‘The Shipping Session’. Lemme make this meta with Hey Arnold again (it’s my fave cartoon y’know. Haha…) in HA, Helga always keeps a lil altar of adoration for her classmate sweetheart, Arnold and she ships him occasionally (crazy, right? lol). Same thing happens here. There’s a special session in the song NEVER × OVER ～「-」IS YOUR PART～ where each member takes turn to stand on a lil altar stage to be sung about in a half rapping melody by the other fellow member.And then they’re brainwashing the audiences by asking them to do the boogeyman session by calling each member’s name repeatedly “KAZUYA! KAZUYA!” “JUNNO! JUNNO” “TACCHAN! TACCHAN” “KOKI! KOKI!” “YUCCHI! YUCCHI!” –See, a minute watch and I already remember their fricken nicknames, the power of Kame and the Fuzzycats are too strong. Lol…–and each of them are swaggy dancing along the named chanting, which is sorta WTF. But there’s one member that clearly enjoys the shipping too much. You can guess who already, I don’t need to give you any clue. Lol. And then they continue with hypnotizing session with glow in the dark masks before the next song GIVE ME, GIVE ME, GIVE ME, continue with LIPS, 喜びの歌 (Yorokobi no Uta), which I must say are very enjoyable. And I really like when Kame lowering down his hand from the upstage to high-fiving Koki and Taguchi. I dunno, I just feel like it’s a (rare) moment of solidarity. Hahaha…
If I have to pick my favorites, I must say I really like the way they sing ONE DROP, LIPS, and 喜びの歌 (Yorokobi no Uta). Because in those songs, Koki’s voice substitutes Jinnie part nicely, and I think it suits him more, since those songs are more into rock kinda thingy. And when I watched 1 Pound Gospel, I didn’t find that LIPS song good at all, but in this concert somehow, they make this song sounds more fun and catchy and me likey likey it now. And I also like their performance of COSMIC CHILD…the reason? hmmm, I dunno why either, but I just find this Y2K millennium style song good to my dumbo ears. Their wardrobe and cheeky dance also fit the techno vibe of the song, which somehow reminds me a lot of… Aibo, the robot dog. Ahahahahaha!! I know, I know, what the heck, right?! But somehow they really reminds me of Aibo when they sing this song. And I find the engrish pronunciations lyrics are quite…cute (Cosmic – Kosumikku, Choice – Choizu) I know it’s stupid, but for me it’s cute okay?! Deal with it. Lol. And I just love the colorful performance in SMILE FOR YOU as in this song, KAT-TUN boys, in this rare moment, dance in synch, not just with the five members, but also with the whole Johnny’s Jrs. posse. Oh and they sing it live and it’s good.
The MC Session
It’s not a secret anymore that KAT-TUN is just a bunch of back-up dancers who’s being united into one group. And they always said that they’re just co-workers with no (or rare) brotherhood-bonding activities outside the working hours. And we can clearly see it through the MC session that (imo) seems so awkwardly formal, fabricated and scripted.So, if we can summarize it, basically the MC session contains bunch of dry jokes (but there are some that’s real funny though); talking about each other personal activities plus a bit rubbing it in each other face; giving fans a material for their fanfic by making a bromance issue between members (Nakame, and Koki with Taguchi)
And then bullying Taguchi; reading door prize winner names in an acting out and wishy-washy manner; more on bullying Taguchi; saying hello to fellow Johnny’s who came to watch to show some *cough* solidarity; and bullying Taguchi. Two words: Poor Taguchi. He seems so awkward and out of place, but still forcing himself to put a smiley face on the outside despite all the remarks that’s being thrown at him. I bet he’s angrily mumbling “Damn, you all bunch of turds…” inside. Hahaha… who knows, huh? Oh, and big thanks to Youkai subs for the awesomy color coded subtitle, and letting the whole world knows that Taguchi is the ijime-chara in the group.
The Solo Session: from Jamming to Shaming
A boyband concert won’t be called a boyband concert without the member’s solo session, for this is the only moment for the fans to bask their biases with the ogles of love and fangirling-ness without being overshadowed by the other alpha member (you know who, right? *wink*). And the performance of each member can be divided into five different categories:
01. Taguchi: The Budget Leftover
Taguchi may be the first one to go for the solo session with the song titled FINALE, but I bet he’s the last one to be planned by the production team, cos his stage setting and performance attributes are so… the least. Basically all the staff prepared for him is only a cheap-budget short video shoot of him being dumped. Maybe they were all making the other four as wow as possible and when it’s the D-day, they were like, “oh, douche, we forgot Taguchi!!! What to do…what to do…” Harharharrrr… *sarcastic laugh*. But, don’t get me wrong, nuggets, cos despite the ‘simplicity’ of it all, I must say that Taguchi’s performance is the meatiest among them all, with all the dance and the hip-hop/R&B-esque song. And for me, hands down, he’s the best-o and most hyper-o dancer in KAT-TUN. So, it’s aaaall ta-good-chi. *thumbs*
02. Nakamaru: The Lengthy-Catchy Illumination Show
If Taguchi has meaty performance for his heavy hip-hoppy tune; then we can say that Nakamaru has the catchiest song of the bunch, with all the cheeky pink heart-light wired in his outfit (don’t sweat or you’ll be electrocuted, Nakamaru-kun, lol). And I really love how the lights were also worn in the dancers’ outfit, and it’s all being choreographed along, like he can turn on turn off the lights with only a Pat! Tap! Snap! But along the watch, I started to think, “When in the world this performance will be finished? Cos it’s sooooo damn long. At least that’s what I felt. Or maybe Taguchi’s performance is the one that’s being too short? Omjayjay, Taguchi’s solo is slayed; budget-wise and duration-wise. So much for being the least important member. Lol. But since I never heard any of Nakamaru’s solo songs before–cos his voice is so soprano and super high-pitch, it can crack all the window glasses, haha…–I found his solo song, STEP BY STEP is really catchy, j-poppy, and suits his voice well.
03. Koki: The Facepalm-worth Sexiness
Oh, this performance is the star of the night, the talk of the town, for the embarrassment level is as high as climbing a giraffe’s neck. Hahaha… So before we reach the second leg of the solo session, we were given performances of couple songs from the KAT-TUN boys and an awesome beat box session from Nakamaru. And then the lights suddenly go off. And BAM! it’s on with Koki in the center stage, sitting on a chair, along with other two girl dancers. And he dances along with them, which was quite good imo. Before all of this, I knew what Koki solo song is, since when I listened to KAT-TUN Chain album and read his solo track titled DANGEROUS CAT ~MAKE ME WET~, I was curious enough to listen to it and after that, I promise myself to will neveeeeeer expect it to be a hot bad-boy performance since the song is such a provocative corn-head. But when I watched that opening dance, I started to get my hopes up a bit by thinking “hey, I could be wrong, y’know! This could be a-one awesome hot-stuff performance! Yeah, go Koki! Go ahead and prove me, this skeptical geek, wrong!!” Buuuuut turns out…I was right. By the time I heard the intro of the barking dog, the shiver of secondhand embarrassment starts to give me goose bumps. And dun! dun! dun! The performance begins…with Koki doggy-chained the male dancers. Oh, goodie goodie boy goodie…I just… *sigh* Omjayjay, the whole things in this performance are rubbing in so-ho-ho(rror) many wrong ways. Example; the song and the dance are so Beyonce-esque and should be sung by…I dunno, a sexy young up-rising hip-hop dancing teen diva rather than a 27-years old mature guy with a hair perm.
Not to mention all the sexy “rawr!!” in the song is so…shuddering. Brrrrrr… I dunno what to say anymore…*face-palming + table-head bashing* I think Koki really needs a lot of booze and crack to shoo his pride and shame away in order to do this performance. Lol. Oh dear, Koki-boy, you clearly make your hyphen-fans wet…in cold sweat of embarrassment. Lmao.
04. Kamenashi: The Snoozefest
After the head-banging performance from our kitty rapper-boy, we were tucked in straightaway with a lullaby by Kame and his solo song titled ずっと (Zutto) which means forever or on & on and it’s so damn right, cos his performance seems like going on foreveeeeerrr and its soooooo dang booooring. And then in the middle of the song, there’s (another) hypnotic session with Kame and the laser lights. At that point my eyes are still open, but my soul inside already snoozing “Zzzzzz…..” and to leave more impression to my catching Zs, the performance ends with Kame suddenly flying up high with the cable that was tied inside his shirt (Hah! I knew it, there’s no way he sings this boredom-tune and not doing any sensual-shudder moves a bit; there must be something suspicious about it…hahaha…) And then he’s spreading glitters!!! Which is so woooow…not. Oooooh, what a great insomniac therapy, it shoulda been titled Zzzzzzutto instead. Lol. I want to give this a “booo!!” but, since its Kame, I shall give him my mercy…as big as my nail-dust… *disappointment sigh*
05. Ueda: The Try-hard Transitioner
In the middle of my REM sleep, I was suddenly awaked by the police alarm buzz and a bunch of police wannabes entering the stage, looking confused, dancing around, and searching for a prison breaker. And suddenly there’s a skinny guy in a hobo hooded shirt come out, and it’s UEDAAAA!!! oooohh…shockeeerrr!!! And since his song title is RUNAWAY he took the theme of a prisoner, who dances manly in a handcuff, to which I say is pretty cool for a dude idol, unlike someone… right, Koki? Lol. Also, Ueda is so skinny, his hobo shirt keep coming down on his shoulder. Lol. And it looks like he’s busting his ass off to shred the sissy-androgynous image that he bear for all those years in the name of Johnny’s order, cos all the vibe that I get from his performance is “look mommy, I’m not a sissy anymoooreee, I’m a man now!! I’m dancing with a cuff!!” And do I think he succeeds? Well…hmmm…yeah, maybe.
KAT-TUN: The Ballad Explorer
Aside from all the hullabaloo messy dance and solo session, this concert also has its fair share of ballad segments, and boy, I love almost every song they sang here. The first on the slow-song debacle is 儚い指先 (Hakanai Yubisaki) which I had listened several times before, but it never stuck in my head, until I watched them sing it live and it struck me of how good the song is. Despite there’s a solo ero-ero arabesque session in the interlude with mixture of crazy twirling and other basic dance moves with maximum gheyboy-ness, I still find this performance cute and endearing. And currently this song becomes one of my favorites. And then there is a medley between あの日のように (Ano Hi no You ni) and 歩道橋 (Hodoukyou). I’m not really fond of the Hodoukyou song, but I found Ano Hi no You ni is so dang romantic!! Awww, me luuurve it!! Even though they already sang it in short version and it’s still wiggidy four fricken minutes (for the real full version is almost six minutes! hah! Viva long balladraggy!!) And they all just sing it while walking around the stage aimlessly, I didn’t find the performance or the song boring at all. In fact I replay this part a couple times after watching the whole concert. Haha…me so bonkerzz. The third one is 勇気の花 (Yuuki no Hana) which is more to a gloomy sad vibe rather than ballady, but this kind of song somehow fits my musical taste. And subjectively speaking, I really love Kame’s singing parts, for it’s really good.
Closing + Encore
So, as they sing the last song, each member gets their solo time to bid their goodbyes, and Kame-boy is so textbooky and seems like in the middle he forgets his line a bit and his eyes wondering like “damn, where’s the cue card?!! Where’s my cheat sheet?!” Lol. And I can’t help but laugh at skeptical tone of Nakamaru’s “thanks” and I find it a lil bit sad hearing Koki for (scripted or not) saying “Thanks to you, the place called KAT-TUN that I hated so much in the beginning became something important and irreplaceable for me. I want to be in a KAT-TUN that returns all those good feelings to you and makes you glad to be a Hyphen even decades in the future.” By that time I was like, “oh boy, If only you knew what will happen next…” And so they gone inside, but then got called to encore and they sing inside an awesome chain-like hot air balloon. But surprisingly, among the encore songs, I found Going! is the most entertaining. I dunno, I used to hate that song for the cheesy PV and hammy concept, but now I kinda like it for their laid-back performance. And then they close the concert with a very awkward farewell courtesy of Kame, which really…awkward, embarassing…and hilarious. Lol
*> I’m really curious and wondering how’s the members’ reaction every time Kame does his gheyboy thingy. Are they like “ehmageeeeeerd…not agaiiiiin…” or they just pretending they don’t acknowledge it. Cos I notice at the ero-ero solo session in Hakanai Yubisaki, one of back dancer grinning really wide watching Kame and he’s like “WTF did I just see???” lol. But I bet the members tachi had gone numb already since Kame (with a crazy disastrous ahjumma hair perm) did that pole dancing thingy on one of the TV show back then. What a good
dark past ol’ days, huh, Kame-boy? Hahaha…*> Really love to see every time Kame looked impressed and groovin’ along with Nakamaru’s beat box. It’s almost like he’s admiring that Nakamaru’s skill.
*> Koki, seriously, please stop sticking out your tongue like aaaalll theee timeeee… Geez, Koki is really going Miley in this concert. Thank goodie no crotch-high leotard for u, Koki ‘Dangerous Cat’ Cyrus. Lol.
*> The moment when Koki and Taguchi walk in linked arms while singing Ano Hi no You ni is really awkward and cute.*> I dunno how much moolah grandpop Johnny has to shake from his pocket, but that black ball hot air balloon tied with a chain-shaped zeppelin is sooooo darn awesoooome!!!! I must say the concert goers are lucky cos they got to see cool stuff like that. Waaaa!!!! Me want to see the balloon too!! Boohoo!!
Overall, KAT-TUN Live Tour 2012 Chain at Tokyo Dome is a ±3 hours of entertaining enjoyable performances with a great list of songs and festive/fired-up stage presence. What I really love from this concert is how KAT-TUN manages to make every song they sing sounds catchy and fun, even though it’s not the way it is on the studio version. And I really love how despite the awkward co-workers gestures between each member, there’s always a glimpse of closeness that shows years of working together clearly resulting something in their relationship aspect. A very good re-watch worthy concert indeed. Totally recommended. *thumbs & toes up*